Does gay sex belong in the military?  No.  Not any more or any less than straight sex.  The military has many other rules on sexual conduct that apply to everyone -- gay or straight. Officers are not permitted to fraternize with enlistees. Sex is barred on bases except for married personnel in their living quarters. Even off-site sex is regulated.

Should same-sex sexual harassment be punished.  Absolutely.  This works in both directions; unwelcome homosexual advances and anti-gay sexual harrassment.  Neither should be tolerated.

Should people who are primarily sexually attracted to those of their same gender not be able to truthfully answer questions about the girlfriend or boyfriend back home and lie about finding some actor or actress hot in or to maintain cover?  I imagine in a couple decades this will seem as stupid a question as the fears about racial integration were 60 years ago.  I can't speak for women, but my guess is that very few hetrosexual guys under the age of 35 would have a problem knowingly sharing group living quarters with another soldier who was homosexual.